Why is introspection so scary?

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”

                        

                                                                                       - Aristotle

Recently I had an argument at work, it became a tug-of-war, and I passively aggressively turned on my heal and left! I felt I was right and justified...but my mind gnawed at me. I wanted so badly to be right that I was willing to sacrifice a relationship in order to win!

As I looked within for what else I could have done there was a slow and disconcerting realization.... this reflection wouldn’t let me get away with the same behavior next time. I somewhat reluctantly admitted to myself that I would have to “fix” the next similar encounter.

For this I needed quiet...but where’s the time? Too many engagements, too much push and pull.

Our lives have become increasingly hectic. We are constantly stimulated by external stimuli and before we realise, this becomes a habit! It can also become a dangerous habit and allow for small things to become big things. I mean that by the time many people seek help things have gotten out of control or when they do they find it hard to understand themselves and what they are going through.

Often, it’s only when we go somewhere really silent and “off the grid” that we can know how noisy the outside world can be.... yet it can be daunting to be in silence even briefly.

Why?
Silence offers insight and introspection. Why should this be scary?
Could it be because we will need to give up self-rationalizing, justifying our unproductive habits and most importantly we definitely won’t be able to feel victimized by life itself!

People who see their lives blowing away by the winds of circumstance will say things like, “She made me do it!” Or “He was really pushing my buttons.”

Why do we give up control like this?
Because it’s easy!
When life is just about reacting to outside forces, we needn’t be responsible for our actions...and the tirade continues, the boss isn’t implementing your ideas, the spouse isn’t supportive, or you weren’t given the promotion.... on and on!

The problem is we all build a thick, protective shell around us, which keeps us from getting hurt or embarrassed, but it also inhibits the lessons we could learn.

The great thing about introspection is that you don’t have to do anything....it doesn’t carry any requirement that you must act on, but it makes justifying inaction very difficult and in time this shell breaks down by itself and allows learning to seep in.

So why is insight beneficial?
People who introspect recognize the fact that they may have biases and distortions in their interpretation of reality and they are aware that everyone sees the same thing entirely differently and that’s OK. Introspection makes us agile enough to frequently refine the interpretation of our own reality.

It has been discovered that people who possess an intuitive understanding of themselves, enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being. Also, these people have more control over their lives, show more personal growth and are calmer and definitely more content. To put it simply, they are more self- acceptant and happy!

1. One of the first steps towards those “know thyself” moments is:
2. Notice your negative patterns.
3. Keep focused on the big picture, on your goal.
4. Don’t worry about things out of your control.
5. Clearly define happiness on your own terms.
6. Introspection is a super power and self-awareness is the key. And what better way to increase our self-knowledge than to look inward!

Happy insights!

Cheers!